< Previous70 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Coat, Dhs49,900, Hermès The INTERVIEW HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7002/11/2020 01:33:21 PM The INTERVIEW 71 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Coat, Dhs12,960, Fendi. Boots, Dhs3,840, Salvatore Ferragamo HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7102/11/2020 01:33:36 PM72 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Jacket, Dhs9,600; Blouse, Dhs4,600; Trousers, Dhs3,350; Belt, Dhs2,300; Boots, Dhs7,950, all Saint Laurent The INTERVIEW HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7202/11/2020 01:33:44 PM The INTERVIEW 73 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7302/11/2020 01:33:55 PM The INTERVIEW 74 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 May Calamawy wants to help. Like, really wants to. It bounces off her like earnest beams of light, the sincerity in her tone making her both instantly likeable, and acting as a reminder to question exactly what we’re all doing right now to put some good out there into the world. “Covid has been a time when being of service feels most loud to me, and navigating how to do that on the path that I’ve chosen as an actress,” she tells us in her American accent, the product of having been born in Bahrain but raised between the Middle East and Houston, Texas. She now resides in both New York and LA, admitting, somewhat reluctantly, that although she has a soft spot for NYC, that the famous laid-back Angeleno energy chimes with her better. And it’s easy to see why. She has a palpably zen quality, thoughtful and articulate in her responses, pausing to dig a little deeper into her reasoning, resulting in both answers, and acts, that are meaningful on multiple levels. Her desire to help, however, is perhaps at its most prominent thus far in her turn as Dena Hassan in the much- lauded Hulu show, Ramy – the Emmy-nominated, Golden Globe-winning dramedy that has arguably done more to rebut Arab stereotypes than anything else in the Western public eye to date. “Ramy is proof why better representation makes for better TV,” The New York Times wrote after the fi rst season aired last year. “[It] is long overdue. It’s also right smack on time, coming at a moment when politicians are again harnessing Islamophobia and fear of the unfamiliar for an electoral power-up.” Written by and starring stand-up comic, Ramy Youssef, the show – in which May plays the titular Ramy’s sister – is indisputably special, deserving of its accolades for its ability to offer an alternative narrative alone. Pioneering and daring, its honest, and sometimes controversial, exploration of complex millennial Arab-Muslim identity is unfl inching, and has shone a light on an underrepresented perspective at a time when the world needs it most. “There are so many stories [about Arab women] that need to be told, but for some reason we get put into one box,” May explains with undeserving calm, expanding on a story “I thought, fi nally! A character that can be part of showing the world our culture, what we really go through, and what it really looks like” May Calamawy about an audition where she was reading for the part of a ‘confi dent Middle Eastern woman’. “I was frustrated because I knew what they really wanted, and it wasn’t that. But if I said, ‘I know what a confi dent woman in the Middle East really looks like’, I knew I might not get the role,” she sighs. “It’s almost performative – like they just want her to look Middle Eastern, or to say they have diversity in their cast, but at the end of the day, they don’t necessarily want authenticity… they just want what they know. In America, they’ve had the opportunity to share their stories about white people, and they have. That’s why we see this whole spectrum of them, whereas we haven’t really shown the different types of women from the Middle East.” It’s a precarious situation, and highlights the importance of diverse casting, not just to tick a virtue- signalling box, but to genuinely and meaningfully represent a culture. Which is why after years of playing a specifi c, singular type of Arab woman, May jumped at the chance to take on Dena. “I was tired of all these other roles that I’d had,” she admits honestly. “I was telling myself that I wasn’t going to take them anymore, and the summer of the audition, I told my agent at the time that I was going to fi nd the role for myself. He was like, ‘Great, great, cool, cool…’, but I could feel it coming. I wanted to free myself.” It’s little wonder, then, that May all but insisted on playing Dena when she fi rst read the script back in 2017. “[Ramy and I] didn’t see each other all the time, but we were friends, so when he messaged me and and said, ‘Hey, do you want to audition for this [other] role?’ I was like, ‘No, I want to audition for your sister!’” she laughs. “I have never been so direct about what I wanted in my life. I just thought, ‘I am not letting this go to anyone else.’” The way May tells it is inspiring – but tenacity aside, it’s mainly down to her fundamental rationale for wanting the role in the fi rst place: because she recognised its game-changing potential, not because she predicted she’d be bathed in the Hollywood glory that invariably comes with such a huge hit. Instead, it was a decision that feels utterly in keeping with her mission to tell real female HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7402/11/2020 01:34:04 PM The INTERVIEW 75 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Pullover, Dhs5,735; Shirt, Dhs13,460; Skirt, Dhs62,800; Boots, Dhs10,000, all Hermès HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7502/11/2020 01:34:12 PM The INTERVIEW 76 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7602/11/2020 01:34:19 PM The INTERVIEW 77 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Jacket, Dhs17,245; Trousers, Dhs4,400; Blouse, Dhs1,900, all Dolce & Gabbana. Sneakers, May’s own HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7702/11/2020 01:34:30 PM The INTERVIEW 78 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Arab stories, with a view, ultimately, to “opening another door for women.” “I didn’t think about it in terms of success,” May continues. “I just thought, ‘Finally! A character I can explore and be part of showing the world our culture, what we go through and what it really looks like, when all I’ve been showing them is roles that involve terrorism or war that don’t feel refl ective of where I grew up. It just felt like a great opportunity – I didn’t know it would get the response that it did.” And what a response. Ramy has been widely celebrated for showing – in all its messy, fl awed, funny humanity – the search for identity and belonging. A struggle that most of us can identify with, but one that has truly resonated with May. “Dena is outspoken, but she doesn’t say a lot about what’s really going on inside. I think that a lot of people go through that. It’s what fi nding yourself means. She’s on this journey and it’s fun for me to watch that and relate to other women. I love hearing their stories about where [in the show] that they felt most represented.” It’s not only May that has grown with the character of Dena. Her Egyptian father, who, along with her Palestinian mother, didn’t give her a ‘traditional’ Arab upbringing per se, but was still conservative about things like “what time I had to be home or how I was dressed…”, was initially against her dream of acting, but has since given her his full support. “When I was 27 and leaving Dubai to study acting, my dad and my brother were so worried. They would say, ‘Why? You’re at an age when all your friends are getting married…’ And I really tried. After my mum passed away I tried to do the ‘right’ thing, fi nd the ‘right’ man and start a family… but I just felt dead inside. I didn’t feel like myself, and I was asking, ‘What is that? I’m just not listening to my true calling.’” It’s a trope that feels all-too familiar; the paternalistic society also refl ected in the show, specifi cally in one now-famous scene where Ramy heads out for the evening with no questions from his parents, much to Dena’s dismay. “He literally gave you no information!” she wails, infuriated by the systemic double-standards that so many women face, regardless of culture. “When I moved to the States, my dad would say, ‘You know, I still wish you were a doctor or a lawyer,’ and I was like, ‘Well I still wish you were a Sultan, but that never happened for me!’” she laughs. “There’s something in me that’s very obedient, and then there’s something that’s very rebellious. But I think my rebellion is in a graceful way. When you lose someone so important, you realise, ok, we want all these things to go a certain way, but they don’t. You don’t have control. So why not just do what makes you happy? My dad saw that, and he gave me the chance to do it. I’ll always be grateful for the faith and trust he’s had in my choices. It’s the biggest gift I could get from anyone. All I pray is that we all learn to be that support for our kids. As parents, you don’t realise how much it can really help a child fi nd their potential – even if it doesn’t make sense to you.” It’s a happy ending to a dream that started young. “I have to show you something!” she says gleefully, running off to grab a book she made aged 12. The Dragon Who Came to School boasts a hand-drawn cover star of a rather rotund pea-green dragon with emerald spots, complete with a brown collar that brilliantly reads: ‘Kelly’ – a detail that May is doubled over laughing about. “I think I was obsessed with having American friends.” On the back page is a smiling picture of an 8th-grade May, and underneath in impressively neat handwriting: ‘May Calamawy was born in 1986 in Bahrain. She is Egyptian. She went to four schools. When she grows up she would like to be an actress.’ “I wanted to act since I was fi ve,” she reminisces, smiling. “I remember my mum’s friend saying, ‘Well, there’s a lot of competition, you should pick something else.’ I went through a really shy phase so when I told people they were like, ‘Where did that come from?’” Sometimes, though, when you know, you know. “I think nothing is unattainable. That’s what I’ve learned. It just depends how much you want it and the sacrifi ces you’ll make for it,” she tells us. Cue a conversation about Malcolm Gladwell’s Outliers, a book that popularised the theory that genius isn’t born, rather it is the product of 10,000 hours of practice. Leave it to us to then steer the conversation towards something altogether less cerebral, asking about Death Becomes Her, the kitschy 1992 fantasy-comedy about anti-ageing that May cites as the fi lm that made her want to act. After various hoots of laughter and a mutual agreement that it was “Meryl’s best work”, May articulates an intelligent take that we really should have expected from her. “If you think about it, it really does refl ect how much women measure themselves against other women, especially with what they look like. I pray that I have the understanding and joy in ageing gracefully as opposed to trying to fi ght nature. You have to fi nd beauty in every phase of your life, but I also think it’s the system with how men view women. It’s about getting past that and realising how incredible we are. Wisdom is so much more beautiful than youth, if you think about it.” It is again the kind of empowering attitude that seeps into her work, wanting to put women at the very centre of everything she does. “There are women who have told me after watching the show, ‘You don’t know how good it feels to know we’re not alone.’ That, for me, is always healing. I’ve discovered that I always just want to go towards the truth. And whenever I’ve shown the parts of me that I’m most afraid of, that’s what’s spoken to people the most. That’s what’s really interesting, and makes for a good story.” And what about her story? Or, in journalistic terms, what’s next for her? “I feel like there’s defi nitely something bigger. Acting is just the platform. I have a calling to work with women, and to help be a part of them fi nding their voice. The responsibility is on us to raise our sons differently and to create a new future, and that comes with fi nding ourselves, connecting to who we are and discovering the power we have that we so easily give away.” If they could also give Golden Globes for mission statements, then this one would surely be it. ■ “When you lose someone so important, you realise you don’t have control. So why not just do what makes you happy?” HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7802/11/2020 01:34:39 PM The INTERVIEW 79 HarpersBazaarArabia.com November 2020 Dress, Dhs17,200, Giambattista Valli. Sunglasses, Dhs3,025, Gucci HBA_151_068to083_MayCalamawy_11417429.indd 7902/11/2020 01:34:47 PMNext >